Christian, husband, father of 4, homeschooler, Austin, TX broker/Realtor, writer. Dallas Cowboys fan.
The office in this lakefront estate home is nice...if you like that kind of thing. This house can be yours for only $9.5 million. https://t.co/o8FTz0H1ZW
RT @RummaTumTums: If you’re ever at a loss for words, just stare off into the middle distance and say “‘Twas ever the same as it ever was”
RT @ThomasSowell: Endless repetition does not make something true.
My son is one of the wisest people I know. He said he doesn’t want to react to reports about the Mueller Report until it’s absolutely clear what it contains. He compared this to Democrats pouncing when Jussie Smollett claimed to have been attacked. #MuellerFriday
Care to guess where this home is located? https://t.co/X93FrRKuSC
Check out the bathroom in this home on Lake Austin. Opulent much? https://t.co/rh4W0Wg58C
Gorgeous home in west Austin priced at $5.5 million. 15 private acres, over 7000 square feet. Surely one of you could use this as a nice getaway? https://t.co/kMkTWw9oeT
Cool new 3D plan/tour for my latest listing. This one has over 3200 square feet in a nice neighborhood in Georgetown for just $399,900. Might sell this weekend. my.matterport.com/show/?m=yAfhna…
RT @deapoirierbooks: Me: Please don't tell me if you're reading my book Also me: Why is it taking you so long, do you like it, do you hate…
RT @ThomasSowell: "It is bad enough that so many people believe things without any evidence. What is worse is that some people have no conc…
RT @BatBatshitcrazy: I'm almost 56 and my dream of being a Solid Gold Dancer still hasn't come to fruition. Things are not looking good kid…
RT @CalebHowe: Y'all are gonna be mad when they open the Mueller report and the middle is all just blank pages and then the camera cuts to…
RT @GovMikeHuckabee: Congrats to Jimmy Carter, who became the oldest living President in history. Bush 41 is a close 2nd. I like to think t…
RT @MrGirlDad: "I don't care if I'm younger than the other managers! I'm a grown man and I should be treated with the professional respect…
RT @WillDammann: All the Dem candidates as Michael Scott is the most accurate thing I have ever seen. https://t.co/ZHE45KHMvR
This seems like satire, but I think it may be real. This woman is calmly wishing for 6.5 billion fewer people and calling for no new babies. twitter.com/mel_faith1/sta…
RT @DrakeGatsby: Me: Aww, a bear! Bear: You’re being audited by the IRS. Me: Oh no, a bad news bear.
RT @momjeansplease: 5: “If I fart into your butt will your head explode?” Me: “Yes.” Science. Teach them young.
RT @DC_Draino: You may not believe this, but I am 100% in suppprt of slave reparations If you were ever a slave, you should be paid If yo…
This seems like utterly unnecessary pandering. twitter.com/united/status/…
I just saw this headline: “Why Millennials Aren’t Using Top Sheets on Beds”. I will not waste time reading that. They can sleep on the floor if they want. This is not newsworthy.
Liz is my wife’s sister (tweet below). Please pray for Michelle’s family and friends as they grieve, and for safe travels for those who are gathering for her memorial service tomorrow. She was a lovely and godly young woman. Her faith inspired many. twitter.com/lizabrahamsen/…
RT @ericsshadow: At 12y/o I emptied the dishwasher every day after school, mowed the lawn and did all the vacuuming. My son is playing vide…
RT @RefinedBogan: There's not a better feeling in the world than your children being just as proud of you as you are of them.
RT @BastardProphet: There's a tiny child next to me on the train. He has a batman knit cap and a briefcase. I'm either hallucinating or he'…
RT @HenpeckedHal: What's a nicer way of saying, "you're fat and gross and if you don't lose weight I'm leaving you for a younger woman"? Th…
We aren’t all like this in Texas. Some of us ride them. ;) twitter.com/abc/status/110…
RT @AnchorFTW: A 'posthumous' award is very different than a 'posthummus' award, which is something you receive after finishing all of your…
RT @signalborder: If snails are so slow, why don’t we ever see them coming? It’s just BAM, there’s a snail.
I think Some people Overuse The ability To Tweet Like this. Perhaps They think It makes Their tweets Seem poetic?
I know a local man about my age who killed himself two weeks ago. The tweet below is spot on. twitter.com/coreyhirsch/st…
RT @ProperOpinion: Server: Is Pepsi okay? Me: twitter.com/OsitaNwanevu/s…
Do you think you control your own destiny? Spoiler alert: God does.
RT @SardonicTart: Fitness status: sprained my neck putting in eye drops.
RT @MrGirlDad: I shaved my beard at my wife's request and she is now coming to terms with having married a chubby nine-year-old.
I think I overuse adverbs in my writing, possibly (there’s another one) because of this old gem from “Schoolhouse Rock”: g.co/kgs/JyP5wm
RT @ladybookjunkie: I just smelled my dishwashing liquid and went mmm it’s so lemony..I’m officially a million years old now
RT @RedRegenerated: [First day as a butcher] BOSS: You need to tenderise the meat ME: *looks lovingly at steak* BOSS: Tenderise, not tende…
I ate a whole lotta Chef Boyardee products growing up. Simpler times.
RT @HenpeckedHal: I hate confrontation, so when my sister and I start arguing I do the mature thing and simply agree to disagree. Then I ma…
This is pandering at its absolute worst. twitter.com/ewarren/status…
RT @bngzyface: Friend: Do you have a hair band I could borrow? Me: Sure! *goes into basement and retrieves Bon Jovi* Please have them ho…
RT @UNCLE_AJALA: Beware of those that are always cheering you up when you're doing bad things, they don't like you, when you get yourself i…
RT @NFLonFOX: Updated look at the @dallascowboys offense: - QB: Dak Prescott - HB: Ezekiel Elliott - WR: Amari Cooper - WR: Randall Cobb…
I know I should simply be happy for my friends when I see them taking nice vacations, but it makes me feel poor and disorganized.
Man, it's a great feeling to get calls that are automated with pre-recorded messages. Also, I love emails with deceptive subject lines like "List my Home" or "I Want to Buy a House in Austin". Sincerest thanks. Sadly, this must actually work a little, or they would stop doing it.
Crossed the 56,000 tweet mark today. That seems almost inconceivable.
I read that the electoral college could be “abolished” if states pass resolutions to give all of their electoral votes to the national popular vote winner. So....this plan somehow does not disenfranchise voters?
Is this a dance-off occurring? If so, I strongly prefer this to the traditional debate format. https://t.co/Pj0UWne0qR
RT @ThomasSowell: One of the scariest things about our times is how easy it is to scare people and start a political stampede. There are pe…
RT @LMAO_in_Fla: “Today I was able to show the police video of pranksters who’ve been ringing my doorbell and running away. This experience…
This game is about 10 feet tall and pretty immersive. I played it tonight. In other words, it was a dream game when I was 12. Not too shabby now either. https://t.co/pofaYlOILu
RT @41Strange: "Fantastic Pit" in Ellison's Cave, Georgia - the deepest cave drop in the United States (photo: Getty) https://t.co/VHhEjQyO…
You can hear it in your head.
RT @DrakeGatsby: me: that’s not what your mom said last night. them: what? she... she spoke? me, a doctor: *hugging them* she’s awake. s…
RT @darrenrovell: Three years ago today: Media member asks Baylor player how Yale could have possibly outrebounded the Bears. Best answer e…
RT @daddysdigest: Toddlers are funny because they’ll say “No” to everything they need to live but if there’s a deflated balloon in the gutt…
RT @daddydoubts: My toddler does a lot of crazy shit and I forgive all of it, but he eats cereal by drinking the milk out of the bowl first…
"Sir, this is a Wendy's" is probably my latest favorite response to rants about anything asinine.
This is apparently the crest of my Irish family. I learned this through Ancestry.com because of a recent DNA test. https://t.co/1IhbDekc0O
I punched several people yesterday because they weren't wearing green, then someone told me it's apparently "pinch". Wish I had known that before the authorities had to get involved.
RT @ThatEricAlper: Dolly Parton, 1976. She wrote Jolene and I Will Always Love You on the same day. ON THE SAME DAY. https://t.co/rasfA0lb…
Too early yet to say for sure, but it looks like I will be voting third party for the second time in a row in the 2020 presidential election. I have issues of conscience supporting any of the major party candidates again. This will likely anger many of my friends from both sides.
RT @BestGoogleFact: Who are you?🐯🐾☀️ https://t.co/TBfgxBciu5
RT @elijahaldrich: My first attempt at rotoscoping. Easy, but time consuming... I’m trying to get color now, but it’s a work in progress ht…
RT @SnarkyMommy78: I’m not wearing green but I’m eating chips with guacamole and I’ll probably spill it on myself soon so that should work…
RT @TwoClawsMedia: YOU: Oh look, they dyed the river green ME, AN ARTIST: Oh look, they dyed the river chroma key green #StPatricksDay htt…
RT @_elvishpresley_: CAPTAIN AMERICA: super soldier BLACK PANTHER: king of Wakanda DR STRANGE: master of mystic arts THE HULK: unstoppab…
RT @AbbyHasIssues: I threw old quinoa under my feeder and now the squirrels are walking around in Lululemon pants and requesting coconut wa…
“Men do not differ much about what things they will call evils; they differ enormously about what evils they will call excusable.” - G.K. Chesterton
After piecing things together on Ancestry following my recent DNA test (both of my parents weee adopted as infants), I have found a LOT of Irish ancestors on my mom’s side, including one who was apparently in Sinn Fein. Should I feel more obligated to celebrate today?
RT @ShootyDoody: I like to imagine St Patrick, in a convertible, top down, driving into the sunset, car just full of freaking snakes.
RT @RepDanCrenshaw: I got no pressure one way or the other. We voted ‘yes’ because this investigation has been terribly divisive and I see…
RT @ADHDeanASL: me: my urine is green doctor: probably had too many St. Paddy’s Day beers. No worries. We’ll send you your bill by the end…
RT @AustinMayKnow: Baby pigs always look not impressed with humanity. https://t.co/l76IE8zVGR
RT @BryanBroaddus: My Mom turns 76 years old today and loves to follow my twitter account so Happy Birthday Shug! I hope you have a wonderf…
Thanks for the retcon. Seems gratuitous and unnecessary. twitter.com/complexpop/sta…
RT @JannaKilimnik: We had friends come over today with their baby. My son took a look and said "I dont like this baby. Hes not cute." Gues…
RT @KatTimpf: Wanting to run for President should disqualify you from being President
Attacking McCain? Maybe it’s time to let the dead rest In peace now. twitter.com/realdonaldtrum…
I occasionally stop my carriage driver to give out nickels to street urchins. twitter.com/alexthomasdc/s…
RT @dad_on_my_feet: 3 years ago you were born And two days later we held you for the first time. We held you during late nights Visits t…
RT @JennSlowpez: My kid is attending her boyfriend’s junior prom tonight. I will be live tweeting from the parking lot for approximately 4…
RT @JRobb773: 38 years old and still chasing that "first Scholastic Book Fair" high.
Some people seem to have “being offended” as a hobby.
RT @David_Venhuizen: Your nerd name is your first name + your last name, nerd.
RT @MisterABK: Who's the robot private dick that's a sex machine to all the chicks? https://t.co/0fptLTPslN
RT @BobGolen: Pray Elon Musk doesn't have a scandal. Elongate would drag on forever.
RT @IchBin_Rob: Me: No! You have to pump walk, like this. *starts pump walking* Cat: Me: If you don't want to learn the Single Ladies cho…
RT @BoogTweets: [fire alarm] Hotel California manager: oh no
 
 
 
 
 
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